No! I didn’t get my period until a while after I turned 14. If you turn 16 or 17, you may want to ask a doctor about it but as for right now, you don’t need to be worried. :)
I’ve been looking through Scarleteen’s website and although I’d like to reblog almost every article, here are just a few that I think are really important.
From Ow! to Wow! Demystifying Painful Intercourse
something we talk about a lot here.
Disability Dharma: What Including & Learning From Disability Can Teach (Everyone) About Sex
Frank conversation about Disability and Sex is always great.
Magical Cups and Bloody Brides: Virginity in Context
Y’all are always hearing me talk about the horrible history of Virginity, well here you go.
Legit or Unfit? Finding Safe, Sound Sex Educators & Support Online
Of course based on some of the points I’m an unfit Sex Educator (but we already knew that) because unfortunately my only background in sex education is this website. However, I’m working to change that and trying to network with other more reputable sex educators so I can learn more and become more reputable. Also, as far as the name thing goes, I started off not indulging my name because I was trying to be more professional and also I found that if I just called myself FYSE that people wouldn’t always readily assume I was a woman which did wonders for my feelings of dysphoria and if someone wanted to know more about me I always gave out my private blog. However, with the new site I’m going to include my fool name because I want to use this as a chance to network and it’s just easier if people have a name to call you.
My many apologies for those of you who have left me questions asking for advice that I haven’t gotten back to. My life has recently become way more hectic than it used to be and I simply don’t have the time right now to give you the thought and care you deserve for your questions to be answered. I’ll try my best to make some time for it, but for right now, I’m kind of tied up and for many of your questions, I’d need to do some research to give you the right answer, and I just don’t have the time.
Best wishes,
Caroline
That’s definitely not something that’s supposed to be happening and my advice to you would be to not try again for a little while. And if/when you do try again, do it slowly and while as relaxed as possible. Don’t pressure yourself to use tampons. Just do what’s most comfortable for you.
Labia come in all different shapes and sizes and lengths and what-have-you. Pretty much every person with a vulva looks different from everyone else with a vulva. It’s possible that one of your inner labia is longer than the other one and that’s okay. Just try to get to know your body and as long as it isn’t causing any problems with your health and nothing out-of-the-ordinary occurs, you don’t have anything to worry about.
You’re still enjoying yourself, so try not to stress about it and panic! I know it seems like everything you do is worthless unless you’re orgasming, but it’s really not, an orgasm isn’t anything without the build-up. And the more you put pressure on yourself, the harder it may actually be to achieve an orgasm. It’s difficult to not compare yourselves to others, but every kind of sexual response or anything related to sexuality is incredibly, incredibly subjective to the individual. We all do things differently and that’s okay. However, my tips for achieving an orgasm are pretty much the same here as they are throughout my masturbation tag— stay calm, try a variety of means of stimulation, figure out what you like, etc. Seek out some research and experiment a little to see if/how you can achieve an orgasm, but don’t freak out. You’re doing just fine.
First of all, I am not a medical professional. I wish I could be of more help, but this is honestly something you should discuss more with your gynecologist and ask for them to explain it to you or do some research to see if you can find some answers. <3 I know it’s scary to talk to ask questions, but I really recommend that you just talk to your doctor about this so you can figure out what’s going on.
- That’s normal. If it gets you off, it’s normal and I promise you aren’t alone by any means. We all have things that turn us on and as long the person you’re acting out those desires/kinks with are consenting, you don’t have anything to worry about. Let yourself like what you like and masturbate to whatever you want to masturbate to.
- That’s also normal. We live in a heteronormative society; most people typically assume you’re straight unless they seem to think you fit into some sort of stereotype. It’s unfair and wrong in about five billion ways, but if you’re not comfortable with correcting people or don’t feel the need to, don’t sweat it. It’s your sexuality and it’s yours to reveal to whoever you see fit. (But do keep in mind that at some point you may have a relationship with someone who is not a man and that may change or complicate your perspective.)
That’s completely fine! I used to be the opposite and I’d have to always finger myself but now I’ve learned how to get myself off with just my clit and I like it better now. Keep in mind that what you like now might change and if you feel like it’s your technique that’s preventing you from liking fingering rather than just your preference, just try rubbing around in different directions, especially crooking up toward your belly. Find out what feels good to you and if none of it feels good, don’t worry about it and keep in mind that sex with another person is quite different from touching yourself. It’s a whole different dynamic and mindset which contributes a lot to our sexual experiences.
I’m sure that there are plenty of people like you and even if there aren’t, that doesn’t make you weird or strange. You simply like what you like and don’t like what you don’t and there’s no need to be worried over the nuances of what you’re attracted to. Sometimes things happen, sometimes things change, and it’s incredibly hard for many people, myself included, to put yourself in a box of “this means that I’m this” and “that means I like that”. Shit’s complicated but you’re just fine. :)
